Saturday, February 13, 2010

Feb 13

I'm up at 4:30 a.m.
As I layed in the bed,I was reliving the phone call I received telling me your mom looks like shes not going to make. It was hard for her to breathe. I was trying to rush out of the court house. I was paying a friends ticket. I got in the car to go to mommy and the hospital called again and this time said; Your mom passed away. There was a pause. I said, Was she in pain? The nurse said no, she was with her when she took her last breathe. I told her I was on my way to not move her.

When I got there, a sick feeling came to me. When I saw her laying in her hospital bed, looking as if she was sleep,just as peaceful as she can be. I went to the hallway to try to get my thoughts together. I was pacing back and forth. I felt lost. The pain consumed my body and mind. I went into her room again and I layed next her. She was still warm. Embracing her. Smelling her night gown and hair. I felt like a baby that needed her mother.

I paused so much in typing this. I don't want to relive this.

I layed with her a couple of hours. The chaplain came in to pray and read Psalms 23...

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.



2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,


he leads me beside quiet waters,






3 he restores my soul.


He guides me in paths of righteousness


for his name's sake.






4 Even though I walk


through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]


I will fear no evil,


for you are with me;


your rod and your staff,


they comfort me.






5 You prepare a table before me


in the presence of my enemies.


You anoint my head with oil;


my cup overflows.






6 Surely goodness and love will follow me


all the days of my life,


and I will dwell in the house of the LORD


forever.

 They picked her up. I said, Bye mommy.
 
 And I was never the same.

Why is my mind torturing me with this.
Maybe its because I have to let it out.

God help me.
I miss you so much mommy.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

She loved Jose Luis Rodriguez- El Puma,among others



Who she was..

She was a Doctor-She would take care of me when I was sick

She was a Chef- She created miracles out of what we had to eat

She was my Designer- She made my clothes when I was a little girl

She was my Provider- She made sure I always had a roof over my head,clothes on my back and food in my stomach

She was a Comedian- She made me laugh when she did a baby voice and when she spoke english because her accent was so heavy:)

She was a Dancer- She loved dancing to Salsa

She was a Singer- She loved Elvis Presley, Tom Jones, Neil Diamond,Larry Graham and
Jose Luis Rodriguez and often sang there songs around the apartment

She loved God- She went out almost everyday to pass out tracks

She was a Grandmother

She was a Great Grandmother

She was my Mother

My tears..

My tears won't discourage me from bringing awareness to this disease that killed my mother. I will never let my pain over power my Love for her.
I love and miss her so much.

I will cry with others that are hurt from this disease
I will comfort those that have to see their loved one leave slowly
I will cry to God to bless the scientist minds and hands to invent a cure
I will
I will make her name GREAT.

She was famous to me..


Her birthdays will be remembered and celebrated just like many great famous people. (August 20)She was famous to me. On the anniversary of her death,which is this month,I will spread awareness. If you are my friends, you would join me. Join my cause if you care.

My Cause

Click here to join the facebook "Cause" on Alzheimers.